Sometimes I just want to say....

I am sure some of you will not be surprised to know that this post is about my dear husband Dwayne. He gets these ideas in his head sometimes and because I am a great wife, I humor him. We live on a pond and he LOVES to go fishing as often as he can. Our pond has all kinds of fish in it although we have never eaten any out of there before. I took him to the store so he could buy some new fishing supplies. He was going to wait until it cooled down a bit this evening to see if he could catch anything. That was all he was supposed to do.

How about an hour before he went out there he starts rummaging through MY kitchen looking for items to cook fish with. He went on and on about how he was going to catch the fish and get it straight into some hot "grease" as he calls it (country ain't it?). I'm sorry, when we lived in Miami we used to catch fish and eat it all the time. Here in South Carolina, we just go up to Publix or Kroger and buy it ready to cook. I will spare you all the gross details of his stanky fishes he caught. I cleaned the 3 fish he brought in and cooked them. He sat at the table feeling like a King, bragging about his catch. Then all of a sudden things got quiet. Very quiet. I asked him if everything was okay. He looked at me out the corner of his eye and said next time he wants fish he will just send me to the store to buy it. I just giggled a bit and almost said "I told you so". He knew he lost this one. I am going to talk about him for a very long time. Sometimes men get into this "manly-man, I want to conquer the world" state of mind and as a good wife you just have to let them have their fun. I am quite certain Dwayne learned his lesson! Now I am off to go get the fish funk out of the air :)

Anniversary weekend | 17 years

I am so excited about celebrating my 17th Wedding Anniversary with my favorite husband in all of the land ♥

Re-post | Things that have kept us in love

*Sorry, long post*

I often have people ask what has kept Dwayne and I together for so long and how can we still love each other? 20 years is not long for some of you veterans, but it is for those that could not fathom even 5 years. There are no secrets that will work for every marriage but I will share some things that have worked for us.

• Respect each other. Hateful words or actions are not allowed in our relationship.
  
• Communication is key. Dwayne and I have an agreement that we discuss things and if an agreement can't be met then is it a "No". Chances are we either agree or I get my way so it works out :)
  
• Sense of humor is very important especially when your husband is part Bernie Mac meets Jay Leno (funny and lame at the same time). There is NEVER a shortage of laughter in the Ismail house. I also think it is important to know how to laugh at yourself. Everything does not have to be that serious!


• Understanding and Forgiveness. This has to be one of the hardest things of all. Nobody is perfect and things happen. Almost anything can be worked out or worked on.


• Appreciation is very important. Taking time to say "thank you" between a man and wife is something that should never be overlooked. I thank Dwayne all the time for providing for our family and never making me feel guilty about my choice to stay at home to raise our children. Dwayne thanks me for even the tiniest things that I don't even think matters. Everything from ironing a shirt, sweetening his coffee or telling him not to worry that everything will work out.


• Encouragement is HUGE. We encourage each other to become even better. I love Dwayne so much because he never allows me to doubt myself or not give myself enough credit. It's a great boost for both sides!


• Unconditional Love ...do I even have to explain this one? I love Dwayne for the good, bad, sneaky, naughty, sincere, strong, arrogant, hardcore, sweet, smart and 'Dwayne' things that makes him who he is...The man I married and will eternally love.

Dwayne and I are from 2 totally backgrounds, worlds, planets, and everything in between, but there is this magic that can't be explained. We just mesh together well. If he is out and I am expecting him home I will stand by the window like a school girl and wait. Of course as soon as he drives up, I race to couch and when the door opens I will say "Oh, I didn't even hear you drive up". I think the fact that we have stayed the same people we have always been but have matured together it really keeps the bond going strong. We always have each other's back. If you have a 50/50 relationship, then you have a great chance at a lasting and loving relationship.

Some husbands really do listen to their wives

I know I crack jokes and give Dwayne a hard time most days so I decided to dedicate a post to say some nice things about him.
*I really hope he does not read this and let it go to his head*
My husband is a simple man. He does not require very much to be happy. I love that he does not care about sports (except fishing). I would take being married to a nerd any day over a sports fanatic. He takes the time to listen to me even when it comes across as nagging. Of course he makes sure he points it out to me when he does what I nagged about. Dwayne mentioned to me the other day that I should be really proud of myself. Of course I am wondering what on earth he is talking about. He tells me how he has been seeing the commercials and reading articles about the "Extreme Couponing" lifestyle. He said I should have been featured in a publication since I have been into couponing and signing up for freebies since before I was even married. He says that all the people who talked crap about me and thought I was wasting my time can eat their words. He thinks that this show came way late in the game. Then he tells me how proud he is of me for being so smart with my purchases and the fact that I am passing that wisdom on to our kids and it shows. That really made me feel good knowing that he notices all the little things I do. I think I will keep him for a little while longer :)

Romance in Whoville

The other night big daddy came into the bedroom and told me he wanted to give me a relaxing foot rub. I told him that he worked so hard that day so I would take a rain check. He insisted that he wanted to do it and that I better take it while it is being offered. So I graciously accepted his kind offer. My husband has his romantic moments and I thought this was one of them. He tells me to throw my feet across his lap so he can put some of that big daddy magic on me. He feels under the covers and realizes that I have socks on. I tried to reach over to pull them off and he insisted he would take them off. Suddenly I hear "WHAT THE HELL? Are you from Whoville or something? Dr. Seuss is missing some socks!" Oh my husband... He didn't have to say I had Whoville/Dr. Seuss socks. HAHAHAHA!!! That's your boy!

*The stripes are really blue and purple but the blue came out looking white on my camera from the flash.

Y'all better not be making fun of my socks either!

"Marry Me," premieres on Lifetime next Sunday Dec. 12

Check out the trailer to the miniseries on Lifetime called Marry Me premiering December 12 & 13. Award nominated film and television actress Lucy Liu (Ally McBeal, Charlie’s Angels) stars in the Lifetime Television original miniseries event Marry Me, the story of one woman’s journey to find her elusive “Prince Charming.” But when she happens to find three at the same time, who she ultimately chooses is a surprise…even to her.

What makes my day right

Every morning is always a struggle getting Dwayne out the door for work. The kids are a breeze, they are always prepared to leave on time. Dwayne is a lounger. He wants to chat and chill in the morning. I am the clock watcher and the nag. I am constantly pointing at the clock telling him he needs to leave. The problem is, we are both engaging in conversation and it is so hard to stop. Dwayne is so silly in the morning with all of his corny jokes and foolishness. I can truly say that my weekday morning is never complete without our long "see ya later" kisses and hugs at the front door before he leaves for work. Some mornings he will even call before he gets to the office to tell me he misses me already. He is going to get me for telling his business!! For the record, he is still the manly man he makes himself out to be to everyone but underneath that athletic chest (haha!) is a warm and loving heart. I love that crazy man!

When watching TV with me...

I have a very simple rule for when Dwayne watches television with me. He is not allowed to watch:

• reality TV (unless it's a fishing or nature show)
• comedy of any kind (especially Kathy Griffin or Monique)
  
• Tyler Perry films
• Nancy Grace, Wendy Williams or Geraldo Rivera
• inappropriate cartoons- Family Guy, South Park
• No MTV, BET or VH1
• no gossip or talk shows
  

I know, I'm so mean and boring :)

WTH Wednesday

I just had to get this one out... If you know me then you know that I DON'T believe in co-sleeping or the "family bed" as I have heard it. I feel like it is especially unhealthy for your marriage and downright dangerous. Of course that is strictly my opinion and if you like sleeping in the same bed with your kid then good for you. Last night Dwayne brought the boy in our bed because he woke up because we were having a really bad thunderstorm. Normally he can only get in our bed if he is sick and having trouble breathing or he has a fever. Last night he kicked and squirmed and fought like mad. I personally like my face and ribs to be untouched while I'm sleeping. I have no idea how people do it. I really don't. It makes no sense that we have a king-sized bed and both Dwayne and I are stuck at he ends because William thinks he needs his head touching me and his feet touching his dad. He better get back in his OWN room, in his OWN bed. The end.

Date night! (I can't take your boy anywhere!)

Dwayne and I went on a much needed date night out, ALONE! We went to Outback Steakhouse for dinner. First we had to snap a quick shot for the blog. The wind was blowing and gladly my hair was not in my face.

I hate this picture but Dwayne loved it. He said you can tell I was having fun (which I was). The margaritas were so good!! I had 2 :)

Someone sitting at the table (not mentioning names) had this fruity concoction. This person likes sweet adult beverages but like I said, I will not mention names ;)

I had the lovely slow-roasted filet with shrimp scampi and mashed potatoes. I cleaned my plate which I NEVER do. So delish and my apologies to the non meat eaters.

Now this is where your boy showed his behind. Why did he tell our lovely server he wanted to order the "Brotha platter" Why oh why?! It was called the Barbecue platter but y'all know what kind of fool Dwayne can behave like. Our server was so sweet and quite entertained by our shenanigans.

We laughed so much and made a couple new friends in the process. I think we will have to have date night a lot more often!

Men in Pink

Last year I purchased Dwayne a spring suit during the off-season for a deal you could not beat. He wanted to wear it to a recent speaking engagement but I told him he needed the right tie. We went out to shop for one and I already knew before we even walked into the store what I would love for him to get. It was between mint green and rose pink. He fought me down like you would not believe. PINK???? On a manly man?? Oh he was not having it. I was able to get him to consider a fun blue and he grabbed the pink just to shut me up. He then proceeds to walk up to the side entrance near the men's department to ask the lady working in that area what her choice would be between the blue and the pink. Without even giving it a second she instantly blurted out "pink!" There were some other ladies in the area making purchases and they all agreed that pink would look good on him. He was mad but the votes were unanimous. Now how in the world does he come home to try the tie on with the suit and suddenly he started to suck in his gut and poke his chest out. He then stares at himself in the mirror as if he was saying "Damn, I'm fine". It turns out that he loves the tie and I am sure he really loved all the compliments he received from all the ladies. MEN!!

He asked, I told

Here is a conversation Dwayne and I had while I was cleaning the kitchen and he was finishing up his dinner.

Dwayne: How are you Shelly, what's going on in your mind right now. What are you thinking about?
Me: I looked over at him as I turned on the kitchen faucet and asked "Are you sure you want to know?"
Dwayne: Of course I want to know
Me: I start telling him that I came across I blueberry brunch cake that I would love to make but realized that I did not have a bundt pan.
Dwayne: You mean the kind that has a hole in the middle and you can make pound cake in it?
Me: Yes, I need one. I cook and bake all the time and have been dubbed everything from Martha Stewart to Rachael Ray yet I don't even have a bundt pan.
Dwayne: Okay well then you need to find one that you will be happy with.
Me: I also really need a Dyson vacuum cleaner.
Dwayne: You mean that high dollar thing? Why do you need one that expensive?
Me: Don't worry, our oldest daughter said that since she will be so successful in her career she will buy it for me.
Dwayne: He has this look of relief on his face.
Me: I also think about William getting older. He will be 2 on Friday. Before you know it I will be going into his classroom with cupcakes for his classmates and attending field trips. I think about William telling his big sisters that they are not the boss of him. I think about William sleeping in a big boy's bed. I think about Brie going to high school in less than 2 years. I think about Chardie graduating high school in a few years. I think about what I want to cook and the list sort of went on. I think a lot.
Dwayne: *Looking at me with a blank stare*
Me: Well dang, you asked what I was thinking!

Flashback Friday/ How to impress your mate (re-post)

How To Impress A Woman:

Wine her, Dine her, Call her, Hug her, Support her, Hold her, Surprise her, Compliment her, Smile at her, Listen to her, Laugh with her, Cry with her, Romance her, Encourage her, Believe in her, Pray with her, Pray for her, Cuddle with her, Shop with her, Buy her flowers, Hold her hand, Write love letters to her, Go to the end of the Earth and back again for her.

How to impress a man:

Show up naked ... Bring chicken wings and beer ... Don't block the TV and shut your mouth!

Flashback Friday- 16 years of marriage

Today is Dwayne and Shelly's 16th wedding anniversary!

We are both very proud to be together and look forward to many, many more anniversaries to come. What a wild and crazy ride it's been. We have endured hard times, three children, recovering from hard times, fun times, crazy times, sad days, happy days, non-stop shenanigans, growth and most importantly we have loved each other unconditionally the whole time.

This felt poster from over 16 years ago has been hung up in every place we have lived. It remains on our upstairs hallway wall so each morning we walk out of our bedroom it's the first thing we see. It's a reminder of the promise that we will love each other and stay together FOREVER.

Vent Day Wednesday

Hi friends, Welcome to this week's edition of Vent Day Wednesday. We apologize for the video being really long but like always it was Dwayne's fault. Be sure to leave us a comment telling us your vents or just letting us know what you think of the video.

It's our 15 year Anniversary!!

Dwayne and Sheliza proudly celebrate 15 years of marriage this 29th day of January. We were both only 20 years old with no clue in the world about what our lives would be like later on down the line. We can say that it has been a great big roller coaster ride with many twists and turns, fun times, sad times, crazy times, happy times and a lot of amazing memories. Our choice to get married was not favored by others but we knew we were meant to be together. Nothing and no one was going to stop Dwayne and Shelly from being together!

Check out the looong nails! Hey, when you get your nails done for free, you graciously accept it and move on. My dress, shoes and accessories cost under $75 for everything! Our cake was given to us by a friend as a gift (her mom was a baker). All the food, tables, chairs and the place we got married in was offered up by friends and family.

Dwayne and I did not even want an actual wedding. We wanted to go to the Courthouse and be done with it, but his Aunt convinced us that we had to do it right. Our wedding was done on a $500 budget and I'm glad we did it that way. No Hollywood here!

*If anyone refers to my hair using the words Salt 'n'Pepa or Push it, I will block you! lol!! Kidding*

We honeymooned in the Bahamas (another gift to us) and I really don't know why we were posed like that but something tells me Dwayne made us do it! I would have worn a little dress but it was cold and rainy the whole time we were there. I had to borrow clothes to stay warm since all I packed was a bikini and sundresses. This was the last hour of our time in the Freeport and the sun decided to shine at the last minute!

Everyone wants to know what we are doing for our special day. We will go to lunch, order out for dinner and share some wine and some memories of old times. Nice and simple, just how we like it!

A week about love

This week's posts will be dedicated to love. Why love you ask?? Well because two people you know, Dwayne and Sheliza are getting ready to celebrate 15 years of marriage. This is a big deal to us and we wanted to share this special time with you all (you know what I mean for those of you thinking very wrong things!) We actually were together for 5 years before officially tying the knot. Hmm, this means a total of 20 years and running with the same person. Most people ask ME how we do it (remember, I am married to Dwayne). I truly feel that we were both meant for one another. It took a woman like me to tame the beast. You let Dwayne tell the story and he will say he decided to keep me around. When he really wants to be annoying he will say "It's cheaper to keep her". Yep, that's my husband *sighs* What can I do, I did promise before God and all our friends and family that we were in it for life. Seriously though, it's a good life! Stay tuned this week for all things "Love". *This is where my kids make the throw-up face and say that they don't know us, ha ha!!

You should impress the one you love

I hear people say this all the time (especially married or those on long term relationships)

"I have been with so and so long enough that he/she loves me and I don't need to impress him/her"

You're kidding me right? Think that if you want! I speak primarily to the ladies when I say this... When your husband/boyfriend first knew you and you wore makeup or dressed a certain way, chances are that impressed him. Just because you have been together for years does not mean you should feel so comfortable and think he does not care if you wear makeup or take the time to dress nicely. Don't you want your mate to still "check you out"?? I know I do! Hey, I don't ever want Dwayne to try to get me signed up to go on an episode of What not to wear. Stacy and Clinton are no joke! Then again, 5 grand to purchase a new wardrobe would be amazing!! **Dwayne I would still make you suffer if you did that to me!

I am not a know-it-all (hate those types) but I do know how to keep a relationship alive. Ladies, I know you are not a machine but you have to find a way to show that man that you get better with time (not the opposite). Fellas, we still love all the silly pickup lines you dropped to get us in the first place. My hubby tells all young men getting ready to get married, or you let him tell you get locked up for life with no parole, "Always treat your wife like she is your girlfriend". That simple advice works like a charm. Trust me, we have been together for 20 years. I still want the same person when we are celebrating our 50th wedding anniversary to try to grab a little booty in front of our guests. Even though I shove him when he does it, I know I love it :) I still am impressed with the fact that Dwayne still holds the door for me, buys me flowers often, brings home 'little' things he knows I love, and behaves like the crazy fool I have always known him to be. Why would I want a different person? I expect him to still do whatever it takes to impress me. **Especially when I get fat commission checks in hand!

If you want a long healthy relationship I would suggest you always try to impress your mate. Just my two cents.

Do you have a tattoo?

Do you have a tattoo? Well, both Dwayne and I have one. Actually he has more than one but you can say it is a cluster of them. I got mine about 7 years ago when we were down in Miami. Our state (South Carolina) did not allow tattooing at that time. As a matter of fact, it has been about 2 years now since the law was passed legalizing tattooing. I guess when you live in a conservative Southern state, that's just how it is.

The day Dwayne and I went to get my tattoo was really exciting. Nobody thought I would go through with it. I already knew exactly what I was getting and where. I took into consideration that it had to be in a place that could easily be covered up when it was inappropriate. I got Dwayne's name in my right ankle. I know some of you are gasping and saying "What in the world were you thinking getting a man's name on your body?" Perhaps it was a crazy move on my part, but I don't regret it. We both look at it as a tribute to the struggles we went through to be together and how long we have come (20 years).

*Dwayne's says "S C B" on the top for the girls & myself. He will eventually get one for William.

As my crazy hubby says, at least if he ever passed away, I could still find another Dwayne. He on the other hand would be out of luck finding another Sheliza! And the only other Sheliza we know would never be able to deal with Dwayne. ha ha!

What do you think of tattoos? If you have one, where is it and what is it of? Please share :-)

Honey-Do List Maker

I found this great tool online that lets you make your own customized Honey-Do list and there is even a kiddie list you can make! I made one for the weekend for my honey. You can choose your background and there is even a key to show levels of priority. Can you tell that I have less than two weeks before baby William comes and I am losing my mind?

The Bounty® Honey-Do List Maker
Make it. Send it. Get it done.