4 Tips for Dealing With Your Emotions After a Traumatic Birth

Traumatic births come in all shapes and sizes, but they do all have one thing in common: They leave lingering feelings of guilt, sadness, and anxiety in their wake.

While having a baby should be a wonderful and happy time, it’s simply not always that. Physically, mentally, and emotionally, birth can be painful and deeply distressing. Things go wrong, and there’s often no way to make them right.

Even if you and your baby come out of the experience healthy — or at least on the mend — the experience can leave you in a terrible state. Here are some suggestions and tips for helping yourself deal with that pain and struggle.  

1. Face the pain. Don’t hide from it.

There’s often a tendency among women who have experienced traumatic births to try to push the pain down and hide away from it. When it pops up in your mind, you may try to shake it away and not think about it.

Certainly, understanding how to handle memories of your traumatic birth is like walking a fine line. On one hand, it's true that you shouldn't linger on bad thoughts. In any situation where there is trauma, we can spin ourselves up so much that we actually make a simple problem much worse.

On the other hand, it's good to face the pain you have to struggle with. Everyone will experience pain and trauma during their lives, and accepting it for exactly what it is is actually part of moving on. Moreover, if you can learn to use a bad experience to improve your life moving forward, that's always the best possible outcome. We’ll discuss this more in tip #4.

2. Don’t listen to bad advice

Very often, traumatic birth experiences actually end with a healthy mom and a healthy baby. In a way, these are the hardest scenarios to deal with, however, because your friends and family won’t understand if you still feel the need to grieve and if you continue to struggle even after returning home from the hospital.

“Why would you be sad right now!? You have a healthy baby, and you’re fine! You're going to heal!"

Any woman in this situation knows that it’s simply not as easy as that. Whether you had to have an emergency C-section or your labor was prolonged for many days, this trauma can linger. If anyone tries to tell you that it's unfounded or that you should simply be grateful for what you have, don't feel you have to listen to them. Chances are, they’re speaking without experience and simply don’t understand.

Follow your own intuition because in almost all situations, it will be right. You deserve to devote attention to fixing the struggle you're having internally and to move toward a more positive state at your own pace.

3. Find out how best to comfort yourself

As you begin to grapple with the emotional and mental sides of recovery, remember that there are physical things you can do to calm your anxiety as well. Small acts of kindness toward yourself can make a huge difference to your mental state.

Here are some ideas:

• Get some alone time. Ask for help from your partner, your family, or close friends. Let them watch your baby while you shop, get a manicure, or just go for a walk.
• Take a relaxing CBD bath. Go to your local Denver dispensary and grab some bath CBD oils or salts. Dissolving these in your bath can have a positive anti-inflammatory effect and will help calm your body and spirit.
• See professionals. If your back is bothering you, see a chiropractor. If you’re having pelvic floor problems, see your doctor. If you want to start working through your emotions, see a therapist. It’s worth it to seek professional help sooner rather than later.

4. Learn from your experience

Lastly, figure out how you can learn from the experience you had. When anything goes wrong in life, there are always lessons to learn, and the smartest people in the room will learn them. Everyone else will wallow in despair or pretend like it never happened.

So, what can you take away from the traumatic birth you experienced? If, for example, you feel that you were not assertive enough in the birthing room or did not plan enough for unlikely outcomes, maybe these are things you can plan to focus on more if you have another child. Perhaps you were surrounded by unsupportive people who didn’t understand your needs.

Even if you're done having children, there are lessons you can learn from a difficult birth. In the end, it is you who gets to decide your attitude and the next steps you will take to reclaim your life and your outlook as your own.

6 Signs You Might Have PTSD

The majority of people experience at least one traumatic event during their lifetime. Trauma affects everyone differently. When you hear the term post-traumatic stress disorder or PTSD, what do you think of? It is most commonly associated with military veterans. However, anyone can develop PTSD after a terrible event that they have trouble processing. The event could be anything from a car crash or abusive relationship to the death of a friend. The first step to getting help with the disorder is becoming familiar with the symptoms. 

Traumatic Flashbacks

Flashbacks and lingering thoughts of the trauma are signs you might be suffering from PTSD. In extreme cases, your flashbacks may be so vivid that they seem to pull you out of reality. Less intense intrusive thoughts may also occur. If you frequently find yourself anxious and stressed from unwelcome memories, you may have a disorder. Places like Rey Health can help you get to the bottom of these instances.

Changes in Emotions

Traumatic events obviously have an impact on your emotional state, but sometimes that effect lingers in unusual ways. Have you noticed that your distress is fading into numbness? When your brain becomes overwhelmed, you can enter a period where you do not feel much of anything. If you have been in that state for an extended amount of time, there might be an issue.

Being Overly Vigilant

Many who suffer trauma become more aware of risk factors around them. You may even become hypervigilant. Hypervigilance means that you are mentally on edge. That results in mental stress and physical jumpiness. Some aren't conscious of the change, so don't be afraid to talk to a trusted friend or family member about any differences that they've seen.

Increase in Nightmares

The thoughts that plague your mind during the day can present as recurring nightmares. You can have unpleasant dreams night after night that center around the traumatic event which you endured. Be especially aware of this symptom if it starts to interfere with your sleeping patterns. 

Trouble Concentrating

There are many reasons people have a hard time concentrating. You should consider what is causing your trouble. Is your mind wandering back to the event? Are you trying to distract yourself from sadness? Have bad dreams led to sleepiness? A lot of people with PTSD note that their concentration is impaired.

Facing Triggers

The word trigger is used in a variety of ways. If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, you may be all too familiar with the definition of emotional trigger. No matter how small they are, certain connections to your trauma can quickly send you into a downward spiral. You may find that there are places, people, shows, objects, or even holidays that affect you differently. Your triggers can lead to intense depression or panic attacks.

Post-traumatic stress disorder is more widespread than you may expect. If you identified with any of the signs of PTSD, be sure not to isolate, blame yourself, or become reckless. There is help available to those who seek it.

How to Create a Relaxing Environment for Your Home Office

Working from home is ideal for people who don't want to deal with long commutes and expensive parking. However, household life can also provide a lot of distractions and create stress. Making your home office as relaxing and stress-free as possible may increase your overall productivity when working remotely. Here are some tips on creating a relaxing environment for your home office. 

Bring Some Greenery into Your Office

Indoor plants are wonderful additions to any home office: They improve air circulation and make the room feel more alive. Succulents and succulent hybrids have become popular features in office spaces because they are visually appealing and require less care than traditional plants. 

Be sure to research which plants might be best for your office by considering their natural lighting requirements and their maintenance needs.

Add Soothing Aromas

Scents are very effective at evoking specific emotions. Having soothing smells in your home office may help you stay calm and alert as you work. Scented candles are traditionally used for this purpose. However, placing a scent diffuser or an electric wax warmer in your office can provide a soothing fragrance without the need for a flame.

If you are growing tired of one particular scent, don't feel afraid to switch it out. Or, if you start to experience nasal fatigue and you cannot smell the scent anymore, sniff some coffee beans to reset your olfactory system. 

Stay Organized and Clutter-Free

A cluttered office can feel overwhelming and cause more stress in your work environment. Not to mention, searching through piles of papers for the documents you need wastes precious time. Keeping home office furniture clear of clutter and all of your files organized is essential for relaxation and productivity. 

Though it may seem like a hassle, reviewing your files every couple of years to get rid of ones that are no longer useful is incredibly helpful in reducing the possibility of future clutter.

Generate Ambient Noise

Having peace and quiet can be relaxing for some people. For others, it is distracting because it allows the mind to wander. If you are someone who thrives when working in coffee shops and cafes, it may be beneficial to purchase an electronic white noise generator or a tabletop fountain to provide ambient noise in your office.

For many people, background noise is stimulating enough to keep errant thoughts at bay without diverting them from the task at hand. It is certainly worth a try to introduce some soundscapes if you feel that this applies to you. 

Ensure That Your Office Chair Is Ergonomic

There is nothing more disruptive to productivity than an uncomfortable office chair. Discomfort caused by a lack of ergonomic support can be quite distracting by prompting you to shift periodically in an effort to find a more comfortable position.

You may even develop neck and back pain over time from improper sitting postures. For this reason, it is crucial that your chair is designed to promote beneficial sitting habits, eliminating unnecessary pressure from areas of the body that are prone to strain.

The home environment presents its own unique challenges to working efficiently. Creating an office space that is calming to the senses can promote productivity and alertness without resulting in burnout. 

The Fresh Market Launches “FREE PREMIUM CHOCOLATE MONDAYS” with Curbside Orders

The Fresh Market knows that Mondays can be tough sometimes so beginning August 30, all curbside order pickups will have one extra item-- a free sample of premium chocolate.  Adding a decadent layer to The Fresh Market’s recently launched “Friendliest Curbside Experience in America” program, The Fresh Market Personal Shoppers will provide each curbside guest a free sample of The Fresh Market’s new 0.3 oz square of Himalayan Pink Sea Salt Dark Chocolate. Combining The Fresh Market’s Chocolate Lovers Monday promotions with a free premium chocolate sampling at curbside pickups could transform Mondays into the best day of the week!

Launched in December 2020, The Friendliest Curbside Experience in America continues to meet guests’ needs and the latest chocolate treat sampling enhances the overall experience of grocery pickup. Surprising guests with a treat complements the curbside program’s successful foundation of having The Fresh Market Personal Shoppers to ensure quality and freshness, managers who double check and verify every order with their personal signature handed to each curbside guest, fast and efficient delivery to the car, and 100% satisfaction guaranteed on every item in the curbside basket.

Curbside orders continue to grow since launching nine months ago as guests appreciate the convenience and friendly customer service of the program. For the month of August, orders are up 28% and first-time orders are up 47% with the average guest rating of 4.7/5.  Providing the best experience for guests to shop at The Fresh Market, whether in store or through curbside pickup, continues to be at the forefront of the company’s commitment to provide impeccable guest service.

“Our guests compliment us on the great communication they share with the Personal Shopper throughout the curbside process, quick and friendly service at pick up and the quality food in every order,” said Brian Johnson, Senior Vice President of Operations at The Fresh Market. “We’re thrilled that our guests appreciate the level of customer service and extra touches our friendly curbside provides, so adding a chocolate treat to Monday orders is just a small gesture of gratitude that we know they’ll enjoy!”

Chocolate lovers and all guests can shop in the online store or download the mobile app on the App Store* or on Google Play*. For more information on The Fresh Market’s or to see what’s new, please visit www.thefreshmarket.com.

*Apple and the Apple Logo are registered trademarks of Apple Inc. Google Play, and the Google Play logo are trademarks of Google LLC.

About The Fresh Market, Inc.

Voted as the “Best Supermarket in America” by USA Today’s 10Best Readers’ Choice Awards,  and “America’s Best Customer Service 2021” by Newsweek and Statista,  The Fresh Market helps guests discover the best with time-saving meal solutions, unique ingredients, and delicious food for any occasion. From fresh produce and exceptional meat and seafood to signature baked goods and thousands of organic options, the specialty grocer has something to please every palate. The Fresh Market currently operates 159 stores in 22 states across the U.S., inspiring guests to discover new flavors and cook with confidence. For more information, please visit www.thefreshmarket.com or follow the company on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and Pinterest.

Whetstone vs. Honing Steel: When Should You Use Them?

Honing steels and whetstones are essential tools to help you maintain sharp edges and the right balance for your kitchen blades. Not only that – using a dull blade can be downright dangerous.

Ensuring that all your knives are properly maintained will make chopping, slicing, and dicing relatively effortless – however, only using honing steel or a whetstone won’t do much good because you need to use both of these tools together to keep blades sharp and edges straight.

Whetstone and Honing Steel: What’s the Difference?

Whetstones are used to sharpen blades while honing steel realigns curled edges and straightens them out. Honing steel is often referred to as “sharpening steel,” but this is incorrect – honing steel does not sharpen blades.

When to Use a Whetstone

A whetstone is a flat, rectangular piece of stone. They are available in different sizes and gradients – like fine and coarse sandpaper. Oil stones are traditional whetstones that need to be coated in oil before use, but water stones need to be soaked in water. Water stones and oil stones both work well, but water stones make cleanup easier afterward. 

When your blades feel like they need to be sharpened, you should use a whetstone. If you’re a home chef who uses your knives often, you will usually have to sharpen them around twice a year. 

You can use either a grinder or a whetstone to sharpen blades, but whetstones are better because they won’t eventually destroy your blades after repeated sharpening. By using a whetstone, your blades will last you a lifetime. 

How to Use a Whetstone

When it comes to using a whetstone, practice makes perfect – don’t expect to be able to sharpen your blade perfectly on the first try. Over time, you’ll gain more control and learn the proper technique to use your whetstone correctly.

When you begin using a whetstone, try to hold the blade at a 20-degree angle. Begin by pulling the shaft toward you while the blade makes contact with the stone. 

When you are feeling more confident, you can push, pull, or move the blade around the stone by using small circular movements – just be careful not to push too hard, or you can dig the blade into the stone and damage both the stone and your blade.

Use a timer when you’re sharpening your blade on the whetstone because you need to sharpen the other blade for the same amount of time by using the same movements – this will give your blade balance and an ultra-sharp edge.

While you continue to work the blade over the whetstone, you’ll notice wet grime beginning to build up where the blade makes contact. Let the grime accumulate because it aids the sharpening process.

When to Use a Honing Steel

You should use honing steel to hone your blades after each. Every chop and slice can cause a small amount of damage to your blade – especially when you’re using it to chop vegetables on a hard surface or to slice bone. 

Because the knife is hitting a hard surface reputedly, small twists and bends begin to form quickly and these can throw your knife and shaft out of alignment. 

Honing will help keep the blade straight and repair any curling or damage caused by normal use. When you’re blade is properly aligned with its shaft, it will perform at its best, which will help you perform at your best in the kitchen, too.

It is important to remember, however, that honing steel is a maintenance tool, not a blade sharpener.