Jan 25, 2011

Re-post | Things that have kept us in love


*Sorry, long post*

I often have people ask what has kept Dwayne and I together for so long and how can we still love each other? 20 years is not long for some of you veterans, but it is for those that could not fathom even 5 years. There are no secrets that will work for every marriage but I will share some things that have worked for us.

  • Respect each other. Hateful words or actions are not allowed in our relationship.
  • Communication is key. Dwayne and I have an agreement that we discuss things and if an agreement can't be met then is it a "No". Chances are we either agree or I get my way so it works out :)
  • Sense of humor is very important especially when your husband is part Bernie Mac meets Jay Leno (funny and lame at the same time). There is NEVER a shortage of laughter in the Ismail house. I also think it is important to know how to laugh at yourself. Everything does not have to be that serious!

  • Understanding and Forgiveness. This has to be one of the hardest things of all. Nobody is perfect and things happen. Almost anything can be worked out or worked on.

  • Appreciation is very important. Taking time to say "thank you" between a man and wife is something that should never be overlooked. I thank Dwayne all the time for providing for our family and never making me feel guilty about my choice to stay at home to raise our children. Dwayne thanks me for even the tiniest things that I don't even think matters. Everything from ironing a shirt, sweetening his coffee or telling him not to worry that everything will work out.

  • Encouragement is HUGE. We encourage each other to become even better. I love Dwayne so much because he never allows me to doubt myself or not give myself enough credit. It's a great boost for both sides!

  • Unconditional Love ...do I even have to explain this one? I love Dwayne for the good, bad, sneaky, naughty, sincere, strong, arrogant, hardcore, sweet, smart and 'Dwayne' things that makes him who he is...The man I married and will eternally love.

Dwayne and I are from 2 totally backgrounds, worlds, planets, and everything in between, but there is this magic that can't be explained. We just mesh together well. If he is out and I am expecting him home I will stand by the window like a school girl and wait. Of course as soon as he drives up, I race to couch and when the door opens I will say "Oh, I didn't even hear you drive up". I think the fact that we have stayed the same people we have always been but have matured together it really keeps the bond going strong. We always have each other's back. If you have a 50/50 relationship, then you have a great chance at a lasting and loving relationship.

12 comments:

  1. BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!

    I am LOVING this so much :)

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  2. Great advise! I will need to work on some of them with my husband.
    Especially the Communication, he thinks I read minds.

    Don't know where he got that from.
    We've been together almost 9 years, and he hasn't figured that one out yet.

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  3. Bernie Mac and Jay Leno? I thought I was your warrior that came from the mighty Mount Olympus, strong like the deep blue seas of Atantis. Your Superman, your prince that rides in on the horse ( well-I don't know about that one), Lets just say your handsome Prince who saves the day. But not Bernie Mack mixed with Jay Leno ... WooooooW !

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  4. I would have said a cross between Bernie Mac and Randy Jackson..... Your advice is a tremendous help thank you both for being you

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  5. I am laughing at paula's response. LOL this is truly a beautiful post.

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  6. Glad I came across this! It was beautiful. I'm in year three and getting a tad bit bored in the relationship. -lol-

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  7. joanna Dwayne Mom1/29/2009 10:17 PM

    Keeping things from years that has pass brings back so many memories especially when they make you go
    (awe......)

    Joanna Dwayne's Mom.

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  8. Shelly,
    I just came across this....2 years late! lol
    This brought tears to my eyes, I see how much you love Dwayne. I hope I can find this one day......
    :-)

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  9. These are very good.

    Thank you for sharing. You have a wonderful relationship.

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  10. Wonderful post! All the things that make a relationship last!

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  11. Good advice, Sheliza.

    Thanks for sharing. I wholeheartedl agree with every reason listed and it is wonderful that you took the time to go into detail.

    Love This @ If he is out and I am expecting him home I will stand by the window like a school girl and wait. Of course as soon as he drives up, I race to couch and when the door opens I will say "Oh, I didn't even hear you drive up".

    ReplyDelete

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